I hate buying clothes. Like truly hate it. But after losing 140 pounds, my clothes look a little silly on me now. My clothes were always tight, so I can still wear them, but they are huge. So, sadly, I will have to go buy some clothes.
Buying clothes has never been fun for me. When you get to a certain weight, you really do not care about style. You care that it will fit. And it has always been a hassle.
When I was over 400 pounds years ago, I went to a store called Casual Male XL. There was one store thirty minutes from my house, so if I ever needed anything, I went there. So if I needed a shirt or underwear, it was the ordeal of having to go.
When I would walk in the store, everyone was nice. Like overly nice. Like ‘Hey, we know you can’t shop anywhere else, so enjoy these clothes at crazy high prices!” I would look around and there were very few name brand items. I remember there was a lot of Reebok clothes. And then the pants and shirts were Harbor Bay, which eventually changed to the George Foreman collection. I will always find it funny that a world class boxer who won numerous championships was now the frontman for fat clothes because he endorsed some grill.
Shirts there were $80. Pants were $110. Shoes were expensive. Most people do not realize that when you are obese, it is hard to find shoes that truly fit. At least that was the case for me.
But I had no choice. Big and Tall sections at store did not carry anything that would fit me. So I was stuck spending $400 dollars on a few items. And if a pair of pants ripped, I had to go back. If I got a stain on a shirt, I had to go back.
So it left this horrible feeling about clothes. When I lost weight the first time I remember actually going to a normal store to buy clothes. I guess I forgot how much easier and cheaper it is to do that then selfishly eating your life away only to drive 30 minutes and spend $400 for two pairs of pants, underwear, and three shirts.
I don’t even know if these store exist. I think online they do, but not sure how many brick and mortar stores are left. Because it’s not like there are a ton of 400 plus pound guys running around.
So at 470 pounds, I got a few things off Amazon. My wardrobe is very small. My clothes are big, but my wardrobe is small. A couple of shirts, shorts, and pants consist of it all.
And now, they are too big. So it is time for me to get some new clothes. I am not excited, but I will tell you this.
I am going to the store to buy them. A regular store. And I will fight every day not to go back to where I was.
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Thank you for writing with such honesty and bravery about the struggles and indignities of life as a fat person. You are a voice for so many who are silent, invisible. Respect. For your work, determination, courage, persistence. For not giving up. Gratitude, you speak for multitudes.