When I ask someone how they are doing and they respond with okay, I get concerned.
OK is a weird response to that question. If someone is doing great, they say great. If someone is doing bad, then they are doing bad. When someone says they are okay, It means something else to me. If someone answers fine, then oh man they are mad and do not have any desire to ask any more questions at this time.
It means that things are pretty good, but there is something that is bothering them. Or something that is not good. Or it could actually mean okay. But instead of sharing it. they would rather not say. So they answer okay. Which will always get a “Just okaty? What’s wrong?” reply from me.
Right now, I am okay. I am not bad in any way. I have a lot of good things going my way. I am losing weight, I am writing again, posting a ton of cards, and getting back to art pretty regularly. I am getting back to having a “normal” life. I put that in quotations because nothing about my life is normal.
But I could eat better. I could write every day like I said I would. I could share more art and I could do a whole lot more sports card deals.
And I think I am ready to be better than okay. Actually, I know I am. I have focused the last two years to just be okay. I wasn’t. I was far from it. I went through a lot of personal issues, used food as a drug, and was in a state of depression and anxiety for quite a while. And truly busted my ass just to get to the okay status.
Now that I am okay, I want more. I am not happy with okay. Sounds weird, but I worked so hard to get to okay, now I want more.
I am going to get myself past it. I am going to eat better (not eating bad but could be stricter). I am going to write more (I write a lot but my goal was once a day and need to hit it). I am going to post more art, workout harder, focus more on my sports card business, and just be better than okay.
I feel better. And going to make the most of it. And while I strived for okay for so long…
I want more now.
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Maybe start with one thing. Pick one that’s most important or a cinch to to do. Early accomplishments can motivate you when you begin to tackle the harder challenges. Too many things at once can be intimidating. It’s easy to get overwhelmed. If your self talk tends to be brutal and unforgiving, you could be setting yourself up for failure. You can do anything you have your mind set on doing.
I want to be better than okay too. Maybe someday.