Battling Anxiety
Let me start this post by saying I am in a better situation with life now than I have been in the last seven years. I am not rich but I am also not missing any meals. My kids are doing well. I am getting healthier each day. I am working more and more on building a website to sell sports cards and art “items” (more to come on that). So overall I have a lot of good things going for me.
Anxiety does not give one flying f*ck about any of that.
For the life of me, I will never understand or want to understand it. It makes me worry about finances when logically I can put it on paper and see I am okay. It makes me stress about my kids when they are doing fine. It beats me down so hard that I do not have the energy to workout as long as I want to. And forget about doing anything to better my career and future.
And it really sucks…
I have dealt with anxiety for years now. There is no solution for it. Everyone who does not live in my head will tell me there is. There is this book that I can read and this magic potion I can take and there is this one exercise.
And I appreciate it. I truly do appreciate when people try to help me. But sometimes I just wish people would realize I do not want their answers. I just want to be heard. I want to put logic out there so it will make sense to me when anxiety lies. I just want people to listen. That is all. So what you are doing now is perfect. And I thank you.
But good things are coming. My confidence is starting to come back after a long uphill battle. I am enjoying writing again. I am enjoying working out and I am so ready to share more of myself here…
So be patient. I am fighting with anxiety right now. And I refuse to let it win.
Thank you so much for reading. Please consider upgrading to a paid subscription where new things will be happening including convos with me, videos, and much more. I am really focusing on my writing as my career and so far, so good. And as always, you can always buy me a coffee here Thank you for being here.